is not something I am known for....running looong yep but not faaasst : ) I am not a person who likes speed. I remember going for long rides with Dan on his Buell and absolutely fearing for my life, but my friend Andrew's old school Triumph was glorious...slow and steady is more my mantra than fast and furious. So training with Doc is interesting. Since his expertise is human physiology I can't get away with being silly about my training and nutrition any more. When I ask a question he will say "you really want to hear this?" and I will say "yep" and he will launch into an in depth answer...now usually when people try to teach me something I can be "in one ear and out the other" Michelle, but it is not the case with Doc….he was a professor before working for the government and he is not only smart but he is more importantly a man who knows how to capture an audience...for the first time in years I am really understanding how my body works as a well oiled machine and how important it is to really think through my training, to incorporate rest and recovery and to eat a well balanced diet (Doc is constantly reminding me that carbs are not the enemy).
When I kind of freaked out about eating a bagel on our hike he actually broke down what my body was doing with this bagel...and instead of zoning out I was fascinated...and more importantly I am starting to transfer this increased understanding of how my body works and uses food to have a better body image.
So the past 3 runs I have done with Doc have been interesting…I have still been recovering from Peak (I did not really understand how that race would affect me long term) so I have been tired and a bit broken down. Doc is different in his running and training then me as he is all about planning for specific races and he is all about speed. He runs half and full marathons (road mostly up to this point) and he has a background in triathlons and had worked at the Olympic swimming facility. He is all about training smart while I am all about ummm not training at all and flying by the seat of my pants. I hit the gym hard and I go out for runs but I never train with specificity in mind (I did a bit in regards to DR last year)
So now I am out running trails with Doc and he is WAY faster than me. I am not used to pushing myself on runs…I can always carry on a conversational pace and I do not run the hills but instead power hike up them. So now we go out for a 1.5 to 2 hour run and he is pushing the pace and he runs all the hills…so I need to keep up and I need to run those hills…I don’t need to but I want to because what he is teaching me about training makes sense…So yesterdays run in Upton was the best of the three. It is a fun place to run with some good hill work and single track as well as wide open rocky carriage roads. I felt good during this run and asked Doc to help me train smarter….I would like to actually see what I can accomplish if I put my mind to it…I have been able to get some top ten finishes in my running with no training and I was able t hold my own at Peak with honestly little training so I can only imagine what I could do if I stopped mucking about and took it seriously.
I hold my breath…I have done it FOREVER…I am uncomfortable taking a deep belly breath in yoga…I am a shallow breather…I am fearful of it….I told Doc how I think meditation may be something I could use in my life…although Doc laughed and shared that he thinks it may be a bit hard for a squirrely mind like mine to let thoughts come and go with ease ; ) he said he would love to help me on this path. He has spent a long period of his time working on both a yoga and meditation practice. So after our run he first made me lay down and stretched my hamstrings(something I NEVER do) and then he set me in a position and he took his own and he said we would meditate for twenty minutes…I lasted five : )
I started with good intentions and for at least 3 full minutes when thoughts came into my head I acknowledged them and sent them on their way, but then my coffee table floated into my head and I pictured how nice it would look in the living room and I was so done….I became Martha Stewart instead of Gandhi and then an ant crawled on me and my ear itched so I opened one eye and peeked over at Doc to see him watching me and smiling…I can only imagine what I looked like sitting there cross legged with my brow furrowed in thought and my body twitching around like an itchy baboo…but based on how wide Doc’s smile was I think he got a kick out of it…still it is called a PRACTICE and for those first 3 minutes it felt good to focus on my breathing…I am pretty serious about yoga and meditation and want to explore how they will affect my physical and emotional well being but I know it is not my natural inclination to be still in thoughts…
Speaking of breathing Doc showed me how to properly chop wood this weekend
(he grew up in VT and has chopped A LOT of wood) the funny thing is I don’t breathe when I chop wood…so he had to teach me to use my breath...and he used the analogy of the breathing from the movie Dune yep we both love that movie (one reason Doc and I get along so well is because we are both pretty much dorks at heart…I mean we both love Planet of the Apes for gods sake…while I was learning Sindarin (the language of the Elves of Beleriand from the Silmarillion) he was learning Klingon hahaha…he says that I am a dork princess : )
I did not go to Pineland obviously and I am glad although it would have been nice to see friends..I had a weekend with Doc that was just so easy and perfect. It is so nice to be with someone that I have so much in common with and whom I feel so myself...it is never work it just flows like I imagine my breathing one day will...I can say it is all Doc but I know that when Kev and Julie read this they will say..."no sweets it is that you are in a good place with you"...they will remind me how hard I have worked to get here and Kev will say "you are so poised luv to do great things" and they will be right....
I am not the kind of person who uses my past to blame my future choices...you have control over EVERYTHING you do and excuses are signs of emotional laziness....everyone has baggage and everyone has suffering and pain...it is what it is but as an adult you have control over how you interact with yourself and the world around you....so I know that my happiness is not from Doc it is from within me....but as life is filled with unknowns and uncertainties..people come in and out of your life when you least expect it...I was at the perfect place in my life to meet Doc....now I just need to take a deep breath and enjoy the ride........